


WE’RE PAINTING THE ROSES RED

by riddlebabe



Category: Batman (Comics), Batman - All Media Types, DCU (Comics)
Genre: Gen, Mental Health Issues, nice wholesome jervis content, platonic fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-30
Updated: 2019-01-30
Packaged: 2019-10-19 08:18:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,175
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17597684
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/riddlebabe/pseuds/riddlebabe
Summary: JERVIS IS A MADMAN BY EVERY DEFINITION OF THE WORD BUT A FRIENDLY SOUL, SO WHAT’S A NICE GUY LIKE HIM DOING BEING FRIENDS WITH JONATHAN CRANE?





	WE’RE PAINTING THE ROSES RED

**Author's Note:**

> A REUPLOAD OF A ONESHOT I WROTE ON WATTPAD ( @RIDDLE-BABE )  
> DECIDED TO MOVE IT HERE WITH THE REST OF MY ONESHOTS
> 
> ENJOY!  
> \- CANARY

"Jervis, what the hell are you doing?" Jonathan's voice was low with a hint of his once thick southern accent. Dr Crane was well aware that the former neuroscientist had deep psychological issues, the man hallucinated and rhymed when threatened. Clanging as Jonathan knew it as, a symptom of psychotic disorders like schizophrenia. He hasn't figured out why Jervis chose to hang around him. Jonathan was cold, pessimistic and old while Jervis was a warm person to be around with optimistic views and a youthful aura about him.

Maybe Jervis just wanted someone to understand him; Jon was a psychiatrist after all, he has a good understanding of a mental disturbed mind. Although Harleen is one too. Maybe he just wanted a friend, but Jon wasn't a friendly person. Why on Earth would Jervis Tetch want to hang around him like a child to its parent? Jon didn't know but in all honestly, he didn't truly care. He's never had a friend until Jervis. Edward might count but their "friendship" was unstable due to their conflicting personalities and ideas, it's a complicated mess.

"Can't you tell, March Hare?" Jervis cocked his head to the side, looking up at the lanky Scarecrow. His hands were covered in red paint, "I'm painting the roses red, they planted white ones instead. I don't want the Queen of Hearts to chop off me head," Jervis turned back to his work, the fact the guards haven't yelled at him for technical property damage is quite impressive and a testament to the Asylum's god awful security.

The Arkham Asylum Garden has only been around for a month yet it was already trashed and partially destroyed. This made The Queen of Hearts better known to everyone else as Pamela Lillian "Poison Ivy" Isley furious, she had almost killed Waylon for committing the horrible crime of sitting on a patch of poppies. Jon didn't think Pam would be thrilled that her blooming white roses were now dripping with red paint, their petals becoming stiff as the paint dried.

"Are you sure Pamela would appreciate you painting her roses? Last time I checked, paint and plants don't mix well,"

"Of course she would, she likes red therefore her roses should be red too,"

"I don't think that's how it works, Jervis,"

Jervis didn't reply, he just continued his work. Jon noted that he was very careful not to miss any spot on the rose, he made sure every area of the rose was painted from the outer petals to the central bud. From their conversation, Jervis seemed happy with his work and it made Jon's cold heart a little warmer. He's seen Jervis have psychotic breakdowns, he's seen him cry over the body of his latest Alice, he's seen him mope due to Batman's interference with his plans. In all the years Jon has known Jervis, he's never seen him calm and happy. Now, Jervis is an eccentric person by every definition of the word. He rivals Edward Nygma of all people when it comes to being strange and over the top. For Jervis to be at peace and not a victim of his more violent delusions made Jon feel like his friend might be improving. Emphasis on the might, this is Arkham after all.

Everything seemed tranquil for a while. Jon stood there in silence while Jervis painted the once white roses a lovely shade of jam tart red. It seemed like the two were locked in a trance. The world around them with the guards and the other inmates didn't exist to them anymore. Every noise around them was gone, except for the sound of a coin being flipped. Up, down, up, down it went. That one noise became louder and louder before the coin hit Jon in the face.

"Jesus Fucking Christ!"

"Oi! Language! God's watching, Jonathan," Harvey mocked. It wasn't uncommon for rogues to make fun of or reference each other's pasts. None of them had amazing home lives as children, that's just a fact.

"Fuck off Dent," Jon rolled his eyes in annoyance. Harvey ruined the tranquility, he's the personification of wrath and anger. He's also a dick but that's presides the point. Harvey Dent ruined the mood of the scene and it was a lovely mood at that. A rare moment of calmness and peace. Jervis didn't seem to notice the two faced bitch, instead ran off to finish his work. "Could you go one day without fucking up something?"

Harvey rolled his eyes, running his fingers through his hair. Well, what's left of his hair that is, "I'm sorry Jonny, I didn't mean to ruin your blowjob session with the Lewis Carroll fanboy over there," He wrapped his arm around Jon's vulture like neck, still flicking that god forsaken coin. Jon wanted nothing more than to punch that son of a bitch in the face, but that would be futile. Crane was a twig compared to the well built Dent, he was nicknamed Apollo for a reason. If Jon did try and punch him, he'll end up with two broken legs. Needless to say, that wasn't an ideal situation.

"I've come to see what the shit Tetch is up too, so what is he doing?"

"Painting the roses red," The lanky man replied. "To appease Pamela,"

"Psychotic episode? Not surprised, you should see Max," Harvey turned his head to face Jon, looking him in the eyes. "He's hiding from 'Demeter,' when will people learn not to piss off Pam?"

Jon sighed, Maxie Zeus was a character. He and Jervis has similar conditions just with different themes. Maxie refers to everyone as a character from Greco-Roman mythology, whether they liked it or not. In all honestly, Jon preferred being called Phobos rather than March Hare. "I don't know, anyone and anything can anger her. Also it's not a psychotic episode, those aren't as calm. I'm a psychologicist, I know my shit,"

Before Harvey could reply, the call of a female voice was heard. It was filled with anger, vengeance and pettiness. It belonged to Pamela, of course, "WHAT ARE YOU DOING, YOU PIECE OF SHIT? MY CHILDREN! THEY AREN'T YOUR STUPID SACRIFICES, YOU MEGALOMANIC!"

"MEGA— MEGALO— I'M A GOD, DEMETER! I'M THE ALLFATHER OF THE GREEK PATHEON! I'M THE GOD OF THUNDER, I'M—," Maxie Zeus, while running away from the angered 'Demeter,' pushed the poor Mad Hatter. Jervis fell on his back, the can of paint hit the brick path and red painting spilled into the cracks of the path. "DEMETER LEAVE ME ALONE!"

Jervis moaned in pain as Jon and Harvey, surprisingly, helped him up. His blond curly hair was all over the place and his eyes started watering. The short man sniffled, his arms around Jon torso as he hugged him, "That hurt,"

"If it makes you feel better," Jon rubbed the blond's head as if he was a child or a cat. "Pamela is currently strangling Maximillian,"

He turned to Harvey and whispered, "Didn't take that long, didn't it?"

"Never does, dear Jon. Never does,"


End file.
